Different Slants

Seeing the World from a New Angle

Eulogy for Bonnie Sue…by her brother, Bob Katzman 6/11/10

Filed under: Bonnie stories,Depression and Hope,Friendship & Compassion,Life & Death,My Own Personal Hell,Rage! — Bob at 5:26 am on Friday, June 11, 2010

Older Sister                                                                                                                                                                                                    Wherever you are                                                                                                                                                                                                       I hope it’s all                                                                                                                                                                                                                Periwinkle                                                                                                                                                                                                               Fuchsia                                                                                                                                                                                                                       and                                                                                                                                                                                                                            Mauve

The daughter                                                                                                                                                                                                               of an                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Interior Decorator                                                                                                                                                                                              Ought to                                                                                                                                                                                                                 Dwell in Eternity                                                                                                                                                                                                       In a                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Universe                                                                                                                                                                                                                        of                                                                                                                                                                                                                             Subtle colors

You                                                                                                                                                                                                                           Were the Perfect one

You                                                                                                                                                                                                                               Did everything                                                                                                                                                                                                  Right:

Dressed right

Acted right

Great grades

Perfect parties

Perfect in Hebrew School

Perfect house

So polite

Not like your                                                                                                                                                                                                        Little brother                                                                                                                                                                                                           The                                                                                                                                                                                                                              Hell Raiser

But secretly                                                                                                                                                                                                      Bonnie,                                                                                                                                                                                                                   Maybe                                                                                                                                                                                                                          I’m the side of you                                                                                                                                                                                                     No one                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Ever saw

Not so perfect                                                                                                                                                                                                          But                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Far more                                                                                                                                                                                                                        Free

To me                                                                                                                                                                                                                           For the longest time                                                                                                                                                                                               You                                                                                                                                                                                                                               Were the standard                                                                                                                                                                                                    Of                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Excellence

What                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   I                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   Wished                                                                                                                                                                                                                             I                                                                                                                                                                                                                                Could be

Perfect

You seemed to understand Life                                                                                                                                                                     Knew the score

To me                                                                                                                                                                                                                          Life                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Was the enemy                                                                                                                                                                                                Something to stand up to

I                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       Was a better                                                                                                                                                                                                           Match                                                                                                                                                                                                                           For                                                                                                                                                                                                                               Life                                                                                                                                                                                                                              Than you were

Because

Life and me                                                                                                                                                                                                               We’re not so perfect

I wish                                                                                                                                                                                                                          You and I                                                                                                                                                                                                              Could’ve                                                                                                                                                                                                               Spoken                                                                                                                                                                                                                        The same language

I wish                                                                                                                                                                                                                             We had spent more time                                                                                                                                                                                 Together

I                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      Wished for                                                                                                                                                                                                                      Too much

Then                                                                                                                                                                                                                             Life                                                                                                                                                                                                                       Blindsided you

Sucker-punched you

Hit you                                                                                                                                                                                                                   When                                                                                                                                                                                                                          You weren’t looking

I                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Always expected                                                                                                                                                                                                      That

You                                                                                                                                                                                                                         Bonnie…

You                                                                                                                                                                                                                             Never had a chance

I am                                                                                                                                                                                                                                So sorry                                                                                                                                                                                                                          It’s been                                                                                                                                                                                                                         So hard for you                                                                                                                                                                                                            For                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   So long

I loved you, Bonnie

I                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       Missed you                                                                                                                                                                                                             When you were                                                                                                                                                                                                        Still                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Here

I Will Miss you                                                                                                                                                                                             More                                                                                                                                                                                                                        Now                                                                                                                                                                                                                            That you’re                                                                                                                                                                                                                   Not

But now you’re gone

and that’s the

Death of Hope

for me

Life,                                                                                                                                                                                                                              Damn it…

Life                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 Shoulda                                                                                                                                                                                                                   Picked on someone                                                                                                                                                                                                 Its own size

And                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    Left                                                                                                                                                                                                                                My                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 Big Sister                                                                                                                                                                                                                   Alone

Robert M. Katzman’s Amazing Story:  http://www.differentslants.com/?p=355

Katzman’s Publishing Company site: www.FightingWordsPubco.com 847.274.1474

Poetry? For me, writing poetry is not an option.
It’s a response to emotion. Like cigarette smoke,
it’s fast-flowing, shapeless and with little time to capture it.
Writing poetry in an imperative. I say what I feel compelled to say.
I’m also available for hire to read my true Chicago stories to organizations
and answer all questions. I autograph my books when I sell them.

I am currently seeking an agent to do more readings.
Feel free to call me at the number above.

robertmkatzman@gmail.com

10 Comments »

Comment by lorra

June 11, 2010 @ 7:49 am

by my friend Bob.

Comment by Elaine

June 11, 2010 @ 9:42 am

Hi Bob,
Paul & I are soooooo sorry to hear the news of your sister’s death, and your family’s loss. In your grief, remember to count all the many ways that Bonnie has blessed your life, and give thanks for the honor of her presence in your life while she was with you.
Yah bless.

Comment by Don Larson

June 11, 2010 @ 10:31 am

Bob,

I’m sorry for your sister’s passing. I extend my sympathies to you and the family.

I enjoyed your posted message about her, too.

Sincerely,

Don

Comment by Paul Eisenbacher

June 13, 2010 @ 9:30 pm

Bob
My sincere regrets to you on the passing of your sister. Your eulogy of your sister Bonnie speaks for itself. Whether it was read aloud or for others to read, it was said. Compassionate, sincere, loving, it was said. Stay well my friend. Paul

Comment by N. Sydnor

June 14, 2010 @ 7:56 am

Although I did not know your sister, I can relate to having lost one. Please take comfort in knowing you WILL see her again, strong and healthy right here on earth. There is a promise that I look forward to at John 5:28,29 that always brings me comfort when I am missing my sister. I hope it will do the same for you. (John 5:28-29) Do not marvel at this, because the hour is coming in which all those in the memorial tombs will hear his voice 29 and come out, those who did good things to a resurrection of life, those who practiced vile things to a resurrection of judgment.

Comment by David Griesemer

October 22, 2015 @ 3:26 pm

Reminds you of Don McLean’s Starry Starry Night.

Comment by Dobie Maxwell

October 22, 2015 @ 8:53 pm

You are a good soul and talented writer Bob. I am touched by this poem. My sister Tammy and I had not spoken in twenty years up until two years ago when we reconnected and have been in touch ever since.

I know what it’s like to be estranged. Thank you for keeping her memory alive.

Keep writing. It’s what you are meant to do.

Your friend and fan,

Dobie

Comment by Bob

October 31, 2015 @ 8:59 am

Thank you. As always, wishing you the best of times. My 7-Mile poem, just posted, should lift your spirits, Dobie
Bob

Comment by Brad Dechter

October 10, 2017 @ 6:01 am

Bob,
As one with a brother who has passed away, as well as having some issues with my siblings, I appreciate what you write, as well as you. You have a rare talent, and I thnk you for sharing!
Brad

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