Expression of Depression…by Robert M. Katzman
By Robert M. Katzman © 2/17/12
Staring out my kitchen window
Black coffee’s steam wafting ‘round my
Sleepy coffee-colored eyes
I see the eastern sun rising
Shooting black shadows to the west
Silhouetting
A railroad crossing’s barriers
I hear birdsong
The same birdsong
Sometimes a red Cardinal flitting by
Always a couple and no more
Do their beating wings warm them?
Are they watching me, watching them?
I watch cars
Coming and going
Where are they going?
Where have they been?
What does it feel like
To have a reason
To move?
My hands flat on the table
Or wrapped around my warm cup
Drugstore clock’s battery
Keeping up the ticking
Waiting for what?
I don’t know
But something’s coming
I don’t want music
The sound an intrusion
The silence more companionable
No twittering small-talk
I wish I could feel something
Not early
Not late
Nothing
I concentrate on the blue
Networks of veins
Flowing down my hands
Raised up and meandering
Disappearing into my fingers
Likes rivers into the sea
Worker’s hands
Still vital
Wrinkles thick and flexible
Mostly flexible
Not yet parchment skin
But when the sun’s at a certain angle
I see fragility coming
No place I need to go
No one I want to call
Not lonely
Not bored
Suspended
Waiting for something
Worth waiting for
Sun’s straight up
Shadows at a standstill
Time balanced on its toes
Not east
Not west
Looking down on me
What am I expecting?
I want to read
Can’t concentrate
I want to eat
Too moored to bother
Energy stalled
Waiting for…
Well, I don’t know
Sun’s setting
Darkness scaring off the light
Fingers drumming on my table
Dull thumping filling the kitchen
Coffee’s long cold
Don’t want to remember
Don’t want to plan
I wish whatever’s coming
Would come
About the writer and his other life in Skokie, Illinois:
Bob Katzman’s Magazine Museum: 100,000 periodicals back to 1576!
E-mail: zip@oldzines.com store: www.oldzines.com
Wall of Rock: 50 years of cool Rock periodicals on display & for sale
4906 Oakton St. (8000 north and 4900 west) Skokie, Ill 60077
(847) 677-9444 Mon-Fri: 10 am to 5 pm / Weekends: 10 am to 2 pm
Katzman’s Publishing Company site: www.FightingWordsPubco.com
Katzman’s online non-fiction stories: www.DifferentSlants.com
Poetry? For me, writing poetry is not an option.
It’s a response to emotion. Like cigarette smoke,
it’s fast-flowing, shapeless and with little time to capture it.
Writing poetry in an imperative. I say what I feel compelled to say.
I sell my five published books via mail order and accept major credit cards.
I don’t use PayPal. I just talk to people on the phone.
Fast, reliable service. Read my stories and see what you think.
I’m also available for hire to read my true Chicago stories to organizations
and answer all questions. I autograph my books when I sell them.
I am currently seeking an agent to do more readings.
Feel free to call me at the number above.