Different Slants

© April 10, 2014 (updated in December 2018)

I learned all you’ll read below from an old man I met in 1965, Bill, when I was 15, born in 1950 and he was 69, born in 1896.  For my grandkids, and yours, listen to his words from over 50 years ago. He lived what I wrote here, and eventually, I did too:

Hard to know all this
When you’re a kid
I was a kid
I didn’t know enough
Didn’t have much choice
Bad times are thrust upon you
Not like choosing a college

***

Bad times can toughen you
Inside and out
Turn your gut from cotton to leather
If you keep your eyes open
Mouth shut
Listen
And don’t make stupid choices

***

What’s a stupid choice?
Drugs
Getting drunk
Stealing
Hurting people in all the ways
One person can hurt another
Seductive people can offer you
Wrong choices
Try to learn when to say no

***

Here’s some things to say yes to
Ways to make it over lean times
Ways to keep your dignity
When money’s scarce
And prospects dim

***

Learn to cook
Food is cheap
Restaurants aren’t
You’re paying for
Other people’s salaries
Their rent
Their everything
Food tastes better
When you make it yourself

***

Learn to use tools
Doesn’t matter if you’re a girl
Don’t give me that crap
If yer Grandma could build a tank
You can learn to use a drill
A hammer
A saw
Part of equality is self-sufficiency
Learn to lean on yourself

***

If you need a table
Build it
If you need a bookshelf
And you will need a bookshelf
Build it
Wood’s cheap
A world of possibilities
When you learn to use
Your hands

***

Don’t live up to anyone’s expectations
About what’s acceptable
Screw that
Bad times offer limited options
Clothes are cheap
Thank God for
Salvation Army Stores
Pants? Shirts? Dresses?
$3.00
Find a good shoemaker
And fix your shoes

***

If you have a car
Shop around for an honest mechanic
Yeah, I know
Like winning the lottery
Except worse odds
But a good one
An honest one
Is like a good brain surgeon
You don’t want to take chances
On a bad either one
Would you?

***

A small old car is cheap
Two, three grand
Sips gas, low insurance
Don’t waste cash on flash
A good body, good motor
Brakes, transmission
Is good enough
If wheels are essential
To get you to work

***

Keeping an old car running
Is like tuning up a marriage
Forgetting to change your oil
Is like forgetting an anniversary
Dangerous
Keep up the belts, hoses, tires
Read the manual
Educate yourself
Something breaks?
Don’t bitch: Fix it!
You need the car
It needs you

***

Make friends
Choose carefully
Keep them
Come when they call
Stay when they need you
Don’t forget to share
The good moments with them
Real friends will do the same
When you are the one
Calling them

***

If people really understood this
Psychiatrists would disappear

***

Keep your pad warm in summer
Chilly in winter
This is why the Swedes
Invented sweaters
And the French
Snuggling
Save a fistfull of cash
Improve your relationship

***

Read books
All kinds of books
Free at the library
Small change at used book stores
That’s why you built a bookshelf
Isn’t it?

***

History, philosophy, geography
Who/what/when/where and why
Get understanding
Get wisdom
Learn to tolerate
People different than you
You ain’t the best there is
No one is

***

When your chips are down
No one will loan you money
Just because you need it

***

Establish a kitty
Fill it steadily as you can
Up to six months basic expenses
Not for Hawaii
Next time things go to hell
You can keep the lights on
Not get evicted
Keep cooking
And be able to
Buy gas to find yourself
Another chance

***

Finally
You young dumb married guys
Fightin’ with yer young wives
Stop it!
Say this:

***

I’m sorry
I was wrong
I won’t do it again

***

Then say it again

***

Yeah, might be hard
But–
If you say what you’ll do
And do what you say
Your wife’ll treat ya
Like a damn king!

***

The romantic
“three little words“?
Nah
My ten little words
Just may be
The secret of happiness

***

Bad times are like comets
They come
They go
Eventually
Each new cycle of Fate
You’ll be a little more prepared
The next time
Dark clouds gather
On your horizon
Some times
You don’t even see those clouds
And wham!
You’re out on your ass!

***

Kids don’t want advice from
Some old fart like me
Think they’ll live forever
An’ the sun will always shine on them
Except sometimes
The sun is only shining
In Uruguay

***

 Hey,
All you can honestly do is
Brace yourself
Experience mostly means
Pain, loss and permanent scars
I want to help people
I’ll never meet

***

I’m near seventy!!
Jesus Christ!
Listen to me, damn it!

**********************

(Wherever you are, Bill, whenever you died, rest in peace my Teacher, rest in peace).